I'm jammin' out to "1989," so if there are any errors in this post or any random lyrics of T-Swift's interwoven into my written thoughts, you know why.
I'm not sure how many people watch the reality show "Are You The One?," but I ...
(And now my cat just jumped in my lap, so my typing speed is cut in half.)
... watched last night's episode. In short, it's a show where 10 men and 10 women are brought together because a group of crazy "experts" came up with tests for them to take that prove they are each others' "perfect match." No one on the show knows who their perfect match is, so the point of the show is for them to figure it out by hooking up with each other and occasionally holding meaningful conversation to get to know one another. If by the end of 10 guesses at trying to land 10 perfect matches (10 couples), they all walk away splitting one million dollars. Seems rigged, but I watched the first season last year and they all figured it out and it was a pretty interesting show, so much so that I tuned in for the second season (the current one). I only spent the time explaining the show because I will more than likely refer to it in future posts, and now you know what I'll be talking about.
Anyway, last night's episode made me laugh for a couple of reasons.
ONE
There is this one couple, Paris and Pratt. At the beginning of this episode they are so sure they are a perfect match. Then, the house has a drunken, lingerie party and Paris throws her thong-wielding self at Pratt's buddy, Jon, and makes out with him... more than once. Pratt was off being an upset pansy about it. A minute after she's had enough with continuing to throw herself at Jon, she goes back to Pratt to apologize. He doesn't want to hear it and tells her that she's not his perfect match. She cries and plays the victim card. The next day they go on the flyboarding date that they won in the most recent game challenge. They somewhat make up, but Pratt is still mad at Paris (totally on his side on this one). Well, they got sent to the "Truth Booth" to find out if they are a match, and guess what? Ding ding ding. They were.
But, she JUST made out with his friend the night before and if his friend wouldn't have made her stop, then I'm sure it would have gone further than that. If they were a true "perfect match" she never would've strayed. If I were him, I'd run. Fast.
TWO
This was the fourth episode of the season (I believe), so they should be getting around half of their match ups correct. Well, when it was time for them to pair up with who they think their matches are, since they already knew Paris and Pratt were a match, they knew they had at least one correct. Well, to everyone's surprise (including mine) there were NO other correct matches. I laughed at first because a couple of the guys got all teary eyed over the fact that the girl they thought was "the one" really wasn't. I'm sorry, I can't take a guy seriously if he cries over something like that. Balls. Grow them. Then, I sat there in silence, wondering if the show was screwing with everyone. They weren't. Last show, they had three matches. There is no telling how crazy the next episode is going to be, but I am looking forward to it!
On a side note, but also on the topic of finding the one I suppose (haha), today, I forewarned my parents that if I all of a sudden move to Vegas it's because I was proposed to by Jeremy Spencer of Five Finger Death Punch. Holy shit he's a hunk. I've been following him on Instagram since we saw them in concert a couple weeks ago. Drummer. Check. Tatted up. Check. Piercings. Check. Sexy bod. Double check. Goofball. Check. Single. Check. No kids. Check. I don't even care that he's 41. I'm thinking older men are the way for me to go. I would totally pick up my life and move for him haha. (Michelle, don't kill me ;) )
On an even bigger side note: My parents just came in from outside. I'm sitting on the couch and I asked my dad if my dog was under the reclined seat that I'm in because I could smell her dog self. He answered:
"How can you smell? You sound like a cartoon character."
My brother gave me the same shit over the weekend. "How can you smell when you are sick?"
I can smell perfectly fine, people! I still have a nose. Just because I'm stuffed up and sound weird doesn't mean I lost my sense of smell. Got it?
That's enough randomness for one day.
Here are some more awesome T-Swift lyrics. These are from "Blank Space":
"Saw you there and I thought
Oh my God, look at that face
You look like my next mistake
Love's a game, want to play?"
- LJ
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